True Joy

The moments that make you restless are moments of anxiety. If it is a new step that you look forward to, you are anxious and it makes you sad in a most absurd way. It makes you sad and lonely because you know that if that source of happiness is not achieved, it would dismember a part of you; a part of you that you believe to be very close to who you want to be, based on your dreams and goals. Anticipation of things going a certain way makes you want to cry sometimes because the pressure is too much to bear. At times, I fast forward to where I want to be 5, may be 10 years from now and I see pictures. Steps towards those pictures make me afraid. The funny bit is that I know that there will always be a way; but happiness is something that you plan so well for but comes along without your will. The greatest moments of happiness are usually the ones that you look forward to, but come with such force that you would never have anticipated. The pursuit of happiness...