Do Nothing

Action Bias. It is a plague that has hit large swaths of humanity. The incessant need to do something. May be that's why I like walking alone because then I am not answerable to anything or anyone. Just like the time, recently, when I walked alone at this village in Ladakh called Stok and I stopped walking and I sat down for a half hour may be just because I wanted to.

An ad made me right this. I think it is write in the message it's trying to convey. Go nowhere. Do nothing.

It's your time
To waste time
Coz you'll never be young again
So go nowhere
And do nothing
Chat up the wind!
Kiss every frog
Stare at nothing
Waste more time
Coz you'll never be young again
Tick tock Tick tock Tick tock...
Waste away (Empty your head)
Float away...
Coz you'll never be young again...

There was a time not so long ago when people had time. It seems to me that people don't have time nowadays. Ok, will leave office at 6pm and go to gym and eat and watch TV and sleep. I will wake up early because it's the healthy thing to do, eat some food and watch a movie and go shopping and meet a friend and talk and talk...
What happened to not doing?

Accident

I have been driving since I was 18 years old and am 24 now... In all this time I've never met with an accident. That changed today on the day after Christmas. I pride my face value assessments so here goes...
I was at the Irla signal which opens up opposite Cooper hospital. I had stopped at the signal and when it just turned green, I started driving my car... As it was a turn, I had not accelerated much. I was in the 2nd-ish lane with two rickshaws to my right. I drove my car ahead and I saw a glimpse of a red motorbike coming towards me, right at my door. I then saw the guy getting flung from his bike against my car and then onto the ground. Quite unnerved, I took my car ahead and stopped it, hoping he was alright and marginally bracing for a fight.
The guy got up, he tried to muster some anger but went for his helmet.
Yes, it's a good thing he was wearing his helmet.
He tried to say something to me; I cut him off and asked him, "You alright boss?"; I then pointed at the light saying that his was long red. He mumbled something as he knew he was in the wrong. I then asked him, "Are you alright man?" He said, "Ya."
Those were my exact words and I am still amazed that I meant them. He seemed like someone my age and definitely someone who spoke English as his daily language.

Just 2 days ago I had told my friend, "I have it so good, I'm really lucky; I'm bound to go through some shit pretty soon.." I believe that this is just the beginning. Some sad things ought to happen to me soon enough.

Request: Please don't jump a red light, especially at too high a speed.
Request: Bikers, please wear your helmets. And just because you are riding pillion, don't excuse yourself from wearing a helmet.

Special

I write in a diary. At the last page of my diary, I have a cut-out of an article that was published in Times Life Sunday April 12, 2009.
I kept that article because it encapsulates a lot that is dysfunctional in society as we see it evolving. I have had the luxury of studying in the US for a year and I did not see the same emotions there, but I do see them in Mumbai. In short, people believe they are special and they ought to be doing something better than what they are going towards or are currently doing.
It also tells us of how simple life ought to be and how complex we tend to make in pursuit of that which is never static - happiness.

Race-ism

It's such a fight, the one that we are all a part of.


What is this life if full of care
We have no time to stand and stare?
No time to stand beneath the boughs
And stare as long as sheep, or cows.
No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass.
No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night.
No time to turn at Beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance.
No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began.
A poor life this, if full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

William Henry Davies 1871 - 1940


The irony of this poem is that I had learnt it word for word, and I would recite it at an unusually fast pace.
What I am talking about is how we desire to chalk our lives and how we run full throttle towards that which we believe, or are made to believe, destiny. There is never an end in sight because we are forever pressurized by all that we hold dear. We never want to lose our freedom and we seek to keep those around us, happy.
We need to understand that we will choose companions and dump them.
We need to understand that we are but passing figments in this time continuum.
May be this is what Ayn taught me, or rather, I taught myself... I come first. Caveats exist, but don't be afraid of some decisions.
Sure, you are bound to cry and you are bound to writhe in pain, but that is what makes you whole.
Tread lightly, make changes, be impulsive, cry vehemently; be afraid of falling, but not afraid of walking.
When was the last time you heard your inner voice?
When was the last time you kissed yourself?
Go now, and find yourself.

Down with the Senas I say

There are a few things that really make me really angry, one of which is outspoken prejudice. It is alright to be biased because somewhere, all of us are biased; however, discriminating and generating disharmony is unacceptable.
This could be one of the reasons I hate religions. Religions were created so that morals and ideals could be instilled in a group of people where law and order could not have been created. It brought a group of people together and gave them an identity without a real force to keep them in check. What is happening now, is that religions are being used to generate specific advantages in order to fulfill one's motives.
Vishwa Hindu Parishad, Shiv Sena, Maharashtra Navnirman Sena are just a few of them. The subtle ones are BJP and Congress in India.

Humans have this incomprehensible thirst for power, and religious factionalism allows them just that. I detest India, largely for this one reason; the legal enforcement is so weak such that any religious group can riot and destroy the 'peace' (or rather, destroy the 'chaos' ) to suit their own agendas. I have no idea what one can do if a group of people from a political party comes to one's house and destroys things.
I have no idea what one can do if a group of people from a political party enters a discotheque and starts molesting women.

India has been and will be a dysfunctional society, therefore chaotic. We have enough issues to contend with already; it would be better if these idiotic morons would keep away.

Angst-iety

Waiting for the alarm to wake you up.
Waiting for the water to heat up.
Waiting for the driver.
Waiting at the petrol pump.
Waiting for the food.
Waiting at the coffee machine.
Waiting at the ticket counter.
Waiting at the photocopy machine.
Waiting for the computer to start.
Waiting for the mails to download.
Waiting for the food to warm up.
Waiting for your spouse.
Waiting for your freinds.
Waiting for the movie to start.
Waiting for the movie to end.
Waiting for the trail room to be free.
Waiting for an erection.
Waiting for an orgasm.
Waiting to start a family.
Waiting for people to give you space.
Waiting to proclaim your territory.
Waiting for the exams to end.
Waiting to reach your bed.
Waiting to feel your spouse.
Waiting at the restaurant.
Waiting to take a leak.
Waiting for the computer to shut down.
Waiting for the signal to change.
Waiting for the traffic to move.
Waiting for the sun to set.
Waiting for the sun to rise.
Waiting for the rain.
Waiting for the snow.
Waiting for the holidays.
Waiting till death
Waiting to reach heaven
Waiting for this post to end.