A few days ago I went to a pub with a friend - Korean. Nice time, had "Blue Moon" beer. Fantastico....
Anyways - - crux being...
A large American guy comes up to us: "Hey!! You mind if I sit with you guys???!!"
Before I could say .. "Yeahh..", Sean (Korean friend) says: "Sure... join us."
So this guy sits with us. I bottle up thinking what this bugger wants to do, joining a brown and a yellow guy :S
Things get interesting...
"My name's Rummy, yeah... Rummy. Well my real name is Christopher something something... but I go by a lot of names."
"O... I am here for a course to become a trained masseuse."
"How much is the pitcher for around here??"
Sean: 11 bucks.
"11 bucks!!! Wow... I know this place where you get a pitcher for like 4$
If you want we could go there..."
Sean and me: Naaah - - we are done with this one..
"Okk.. you guys got a car? We should go there... It's on ****** Street.
It's a gay bar, but hey! You can be straight and still go there you know!!
It's very relieving to be at that sorta place."
At this time, Sean starts making a puking sound.
"You know.. my dad was in Korea once. He fought as an American over there long ago.
Funny thing is, he got gonorrhea by the time he came back.
So my mum flipped and she told my dad : "I'm gonna sleep with our neighbour just to spite you!
I hate that bitch; cause you know... my dad apologised. He said that it was really lonely there and he really regretted it. But I hate that bitch for what she did. She left us you know..."
"Once, the cops came over to my house wanting to arrest me for murder. I was like, hey!! I just had a lobster... you can't arrest me for murder."
"Hey.. 11 bucks huh? I know this place where we can get a pitcher for 4 bucks!!"
(Yeah he said it again.)
"You know I give very nice massages.. I know some (wink) tricks for a good massage."
(Turning around to another table pointing to a girl) " I'm gonna buy YOU a drink!!!!
And I don't even know why!!!"
(Turning to another table) "Daymm!!! Can't you keep it down!!! We are trying to have a conversation here."
"Why don't you guys give me your number?? I can call you guys for a party if there is one... It would be fun!"
"My friend got his friend over for a few days ;)
And she got her friend... So you know... I slept with her and it was awesome..
She said she was 18.
Turns out she was 16 - I was like O ****!!!
Later, her parents come looking for her.. and she had to camp at my place for a week!!
She would clean the apartment and everything!! Wow.. those were some good days."
Words cannot do justice to how adorable that masseuse was :(
We may not meet him again.